Wearing my heart on my blog...

Funny enough, my last post was about how we moved to Kleefeld.
This one is about how we want to move back to Winnipeg.


Ever since Lucy was born, (and I suppose before she was born) we have been in a season of transition, change and/or waiting for change. It has been a trying season to say the least. I'm exhausted.


I'm trying to be hopeful, to trust God, to wait patiently, to have faith, to... But I'm waning. A little bit of history on me: I don't do well with change. The Winnipeg Jets just recently fired head coach Claude Noel and replaced him with Paul Maurice. This actually threw me off a bit. A situation, which in absolutely ZERO way affects me, threw me for a loop. Now, think how change that ACTUALLY affects me, affects me.


We've been in Kleefeld for about 6 months. We knew about 1 month in that this was for sure not going to be long term. The commute was proving to be more than we bargained for, with Cody being gone exceptionally long days. This has been trying on all of us, but especially Cody and the boys. Who just want their dad to be home. The easiest way to sum it up, is when we were in Winnipeg, we were very close to the church...so close, that we didn't even realize just how much we were involved in different things because when it came to doing them, we never gave it a second thought. Adding a 45 minute commute (each way) has made it very clear what we are all involved in, and committed to. Where before we didn't have to think much about getting to evening meetings, bomber games, running some errands, hanging out with friends, small group, etc, has become a bit of a headache trying to figure it all out, all the while, trying to ensure our 3 little ones don't spend the majority of their time in the van. Because of these commitments that we have (and that we want to keep!), our family time has been reduced to 1-2 suppers together a week, and hanging out in the van...hoping that the kids don't start freaking out because they are stuck in the van, just wanting to be wherever we are going. I know this is a common phrase in any car...but "When are we going to be there?" is getting hard to hear.


So, we took a step. We listed our house. And, as things do outside of Winnipeg, it will sit. And sit. And sit. Anywhere between 30-75 days. Ugh. Patience is a virtue....I need to keep reminding myself that. But it's hard. We have been waiting and praying so long about this. We both kind of thought that after we took this step, things would just start to fall into place. And it seemed like it did...we had a showing the day after we listed it. We were hopeful! We were praying! We heard nothing. I guess they weren't interested. And that's ok. It hasn't even been on the market a week.


My struggle is that while this is (slowly) happening, we have found a house in Winnipeg that would be quite perfect for us. It's in our old neighbourhood (where we want to be), it's in our price range, it's move in ready...but we can't do anything about it. Our current house needs to sell first. Conditional offers are not really entertained in the city. Part of me just wants to do it and see...you never know if you don't try. But our realtor suggested not to...and my husband (the breadwinner) is out of town until Friday.


So alas, I feel stuck. Can't move forward. Don't really know when we'll be able to. And with that, we are still just stuck in a transition stage, with change ahead. I find it very hard to live in the now, when we don't know what the 'now' is, and for how long the 'now' will be...


I don't know...all that to say. We need prayer. Prayer for patience and trust that God has a bigger plan for us than we can imagine. Prayer that this house will buck the trend of a slow market and sell quickly, and that the house in Winnipeg would buck the trend of a fast market and not sell until we can buy it. That's what I want. A quick sale, and to buy the house in Winnipeg. So we can move back home, and get back to living a more simple life, where the things that we love to do, don't feel so much like a burden because we have to drive so far. And so my kids can actually live life outside of a vehicle. They'd like that.

So where exactly is that?

We moved.
To Kleefeld, MB.
Where is that?
Close to Steinbach.

It was a tough decision for us to make. We had outgrown our Winnipeg home. But what we were looking for, was not to be found in Winnipeg at a price we could afford.

So we moved. To Kleefeld.

If you asked me what I thought about it...I kinda get a weird vibe. And I could not place my finger on it, until last night. It's a small town. Not the small town I grew up in. Nobody knows us. We're new. So yes...people will slow down to a walking speed when driving by...maybe even do a loop around to check you out a second time. It's weird. But I get it.

There is a new development going up to the east of us...so we won't be the new 'new' ones for long...

ugh, ugh, ugh.

This has been a trying week to say the least.
It started on Friday...Jacob caught a cold. It was a doozy.
Then Saturday rolled around...Jacob woke up with pink eye.
Then Saturday afternoon rolled around...I had pink eye.
Then Sunday morning rolled around...I had a bad cold, but the pink eye was gone.
Monday, Cody gets said cold.
Tuesday, Jacob's pink eye is mostly cleared up...Cody's cold gets worse.
Wednesday morning...Cody gets an ear infection.
Wednesday afternoon...Dana gets an ear infection.
Wednesday evening...take out.

me: charlie....why is jacob naked?
charlie: he was doing a little booty dance.

I know sometimes 'moms groups' get a bad rap, but I really like the group I am part of.
We met this evening...it's cold, rainy and, in my opinion, quite miserable out. My boys have been extra tired and sick thesd days, so even though it was a lot of running around, I was so happy to have these other mom's over this evening.
Ya...we talk about kids, we talk about being a mom...it is afterall a group of mom's gathering. But it has become more than that. I feel like it's a safe place where we can share our struggles, our fears, our frustrations.
It was a small group tonight, but it was good. I like this group, and I am so thankful to be a part of it. And I got to snuggle (and bounce) with an almost newborn.

Waiting for grace.

It's been a trying few weeks here at the Anderson household. I still haven't been feeling 100%, which I`m sure is causing the bulk of the issues. In other words, I`m slacking off. Dishes pile up, laundry piles up, floors go unswept, beds unmade (wait, I never did that anyways), suppers are lame. By lunch time, I`m spent. I forget how tired you get being pregnant. First time pregos out there, who happen to read this, enjoy the time that you can rest and sleep whenever you want.
I feel mostly bad for my boys though. Mostly. They are being difficult too. I`m sure it`s just me, and my attitude which is the root of it all...but I`m gonna be a suck here, and to be totally honest...I don`t want to take all the blame right now.

Charlie is 3 now. That should explain it all. We`re learning how to discipline him accordingly. He really is a good kid. But like any kid, if he`s tired or hungry, look out! Our biggest issue with him right now is the listening...Sometimes, he legit doesn`t hear us. He`s like his dad that way...so focused on whatever he is doing, the rest of the world is pretty tuned out. But the other times...oh he hears us. Then turns around and does the EXACT THING WE ARE TELLING HIM NOT TO DO. I know all kids do this. I know this is nothing new, that I`m not in some unique situation or anything. But it is so incredibly frustrating! Cue the deep breath and hope that what I say to him does not come out in a loud screaming voice. Deep breath...don`t scream...be calm...AHHHHHHHHHHH!

Jacob is 1. And teething. Again, that should explain it all. I should be loving and comforting to my poor little guy. Thing is...he screams. A high pitched, ear piercing, nose bleed inducing (ok, not that bad) scream. It honestly makes you want to poke your eyeballs out. Literally. Not that I`ve tried it...but I`ve thought about it.

And so there it is...I`m tired. I`m sick. I have headaches. And I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old, whom I love dearly. It`s been a long 13 weeks of pregnancy so far. I`m praying that grace comes soon...that sickness will ease, that teething will stop (for now), that I`d have patience and grace when it comes to parenting Charlie.

change.

Lots has changed these past few weeks. Lots is changing.

1. We bought a van...which of course raised everyone's suspicions about "is she pregnant again???"
2. I am pregnant again. Due April 11. Feeling terrible. Perhaps a girl???? ;)
3. Jacob turned 1. Hard to believe a year and more has passed since I had my baby boy.
4. Charlie will be 3 on Wednesday. Even harder to believe.
5. I always manage to get my yearly cold while pregnant. Which is of course when you can't take anything to help with it. Vitamin C and water...here I come.
6. We are fish owners, against our will. My sister brought Charlie out to buy someone a fish...she ended up buying Charlie one too. He is blue, and his name is...Blue.
7. I have more tomatoes than I know what to do with right now.
8. I'm ready for fall weather...cozy sweaters and the like.
9. We're trying to figure out how to make our 2 bedroom house work with 3 kids. Stay tuned...
10. We get to go away to Banff in October (just Cody and I). I'm so excited to sleep through the night...and then after that, we're off on a family road trip to a wedding!

I guess that's the bulk of what's been happening around here. We're all tired, but life is good.