Funny enough, my last post was about how we moved to Kleefeld.
This one is about how we want to move back to Winnipeg.
Ever since Lucy was born, (and I suppose before she was born) we have been in a season of transition, change and/or waiting for change. It has been a trying season to say the least. I'm exhausted.
I'm trying to be hopeful, to trust God, to wait patiently, to have faith, to... But I'm waning. A little bit of history on me: I don't do well with change. The Winnipeg Jets just recently fired head coach Claude Noel and replaced him with Paul Maurice. This actually threw me off a bit. A situation, which in absolutely ZERO way affects me, threw me for a loop. Now, think how change that ACTUALLY affects me, affects me.
We've been in Kleefeld for about 6 months. We knew about 1 month in that this was for sure not going to be long term. The commute was proving to be more than we bargained for, with Cody being gone exceptionally long days. This has been trying on all of us, but especially Cody and the boys. Who just want their dad to be home. The easiest way to sum it up, is when we were in Winnipeg, we were very close to the church...so close, that we didn't even realize just how much we were involved in different things because when it came to doing them, we never gave it a second thought. Adding a 45 minute commute (each way) has made it very clear what we are all involved in, and committed to. Where before we didn't have to think much about getting to evening meetings, bomber games, running some errands, hanging out with friends, small group, etc, has become a bit of a headache trying to figure it all out, all the while, trying to ensure our 3 little ones don't spend the majority of their time in the van. Because of these commitments that we have (and that we want to keep!), our family time has been reduced to 1-2 suppers together a week, and hanging out in the van...hoping that the kids don't start freaking out because they are stuck in the van, just wanting to be wherever we are going. I know this is a common phrase in any car...but "When are we going to be there?" is getting hard to hear.
So, we took a step. We listed our house. And, as things do outside of Winnipeg, it will sit. And sit. And sit. Anywhere between 30-75 days. Ugh. Patience is a virtue....I need to keep reminding myself that. But it's hard. We have been waiting and praying so long about this. We both kind of thought that after we took this step, things would just start to fall into place. And it seemed like it did...we had a showing the day after we listed it. We were hopeful! We were praying! We heard nothing. I guess they weren't interested. And that's ok. It hasn't even been on the market a week.
My struggle is that while this is (slowly) happening, we have found a house in Winnipeg that would be quite perfect for us. It's in our old neighbourhood (where we want to be), it's in our price range, it's move in ready...but we can't do anything about it. Our current house needs to sell first. Conditional offers are not really entertained in the city. Part of me just wants to do it and see...you never know if you don't try. But our realtor suggested not to...and my husband (the breadwinner) is out of town until Friday.
So alas, I feel stuck. Can't move forward. Don't really know when we'll be able to. And with that, we are still just stuck in a transition stage, with change ahead. I find it very hard to live in the now, when we don't know what the 'now' is, and for how long the 'now' will be...
I don't know...all that to say. We need prayer. Prayer for patience and trust that God has a bigger plan for us than we can imagine. Prayer that this house will buck the trend of a slow market and sell quickly, and that the house in Winnipeg would buck the trend of a fast market and not sell until we can buy it. That's what I want. A quick sale, and to buy the house in Winnipeg. So we can move back home, and get back to living a more simple life, where the things that we love to do, don't feel so much like a burden because we have to drive so far. And so my kids can actually live life outside of a vehicle. They'd like that.
